Buddha *hearts* me, yes he does

My week began with a colassal mistake which I was sure would cause me a friendship I had grown to truly appreciate. Although I seemed to have some redemption with a reconciliation between me and a friend that had been estranged for awhile, I felt chaos all around me, and I didn't see an end in sight.

Yesterday was spent online doing more research into Buddhism, a "religion" I had labeled myself but never really delved very far into. This being part of my weekend homework, I hope to be even more knowledgable by next Monday. B/c see, the very basis of Buddhism is chaos. And so I already have a working understanding of that. And after asking Buddha for help (which I haven't done since my days of sobriety), I started to feel better. And last night I stayed in and didn't have the anxiety to leave the house as I often do--although having no money helped that urge of course.

I was well rested, had written down my few personal goals for this weekend, and came into work to find that not only had my troubled friendship had healed itself and we were on speaking terms again, but another relationship in turmoil has been able to heal slightly. I feel a sense of calm as I think about staying in this evening (although I do have a couple errands to run but that should get the urge of being out and about clean out of my system), staying in, making dinner, relaxing with some wine and MIDNIGHT CLUB DUB EDITION.

Tomorrow is FABULOUS FRIDAY, my only meal out of the house in the next couple weeks. Me and Jackie are going to the Continental Midtown to enjoy martinis and decadent food. I have a dart team meeting on Saturday, where I will make my final decision on whether I'm in or I'm out. And finally on Sunday I will be going to AZURE to see Todd the bartender in his open mic glory.

Its sounds like so many plans and so much to do. But really, other than dinner tomorrow its all tentative. I am w/o a cell phone so that's fun. Its ridiculous how much I feel like I"ve lost a limb or something. But I'm finally getting the NOKIA i've been in lurve with forever, complete with full QWERTY keyboard. :drool:

I'm ok, you're ok.
+++++++++++end of transmission+++++++++++