Lou’s Birthday Story…by Mary, Kelley, Jaime, Nick and Paul…06.07.04

Lou was so happy! It was his 30th Birthday and all the drunkards of the land had gathered at the local bar for some wine, women and song. As always, the women came first with their juicy bungholes that glistened under the bright moon. Their assholes were loose and easily penetrated. Lou was ready for a night of adventure and anal pleasure. He has ordered his first shipment of Vietnamese whores, when…
Skeet, Skeet, the whores were hot and ready. But OI! Problem…bamboo shoots? Oh decisions, decisions. So he went for it anyway.
And then Bob came in to tell him this wasn’t what the Punisher would do, drowned out by the thoughts of Zombies and someone who said he looked like Tom Cruise. Lou then decided to kill them. They died a death most painful, full of screams and sucking [sic] chest wounds.
Then suddenly, GOD appeared in the form of an Afghanistanian YMCA Bus Driver named Gus. Gus said to Lou:
“Lou, since you have made it this far in life and since you killed that pack of rabid Vietnamese anal sluts, You are my chosen prophet!” So Lou’s first chuch, called “THE TEMPLE OF THE BLEEDING ULCER” was formed on the very spot of COMICS & MORE.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR. CYPHERE!!!!!